The irony of this post, “Falling in and out of Love with School,” is that I have taken forever (two months to be exact) to write, edit, and interview as a result of my own disinterest, or falling out of love, with writing.

Let me explain…

This past semester I encountered a professor who did not value unique writing voices. When giving an assignment, this professor anticipated that students would touch on points x, y, and z. And when grading, there was very little exception to her expectations. Even when a student supported their own perspective and argument with evidence, this professor would say that student was incorrect which always resulted in a poor grade.

During my time at Lesley University, this strict (and what seems to me close-minded) way of teaching has never manifested itself in the strength that it did in this particular course. Although I loved some of the readings, I absolutely dreaded writing about them. I was set up for failure, and subsequently became disengaged with the class.

As someone who has consistently loved school, I found myself feeling genuinely stuck. Suddenly I was searching for motivation to engage in a class that did not want to hear perspective. What was the point of tailoring my opinions just to get a good grade? I will say that the only positive spin on this experience is the reminder that shutting down student voices leads to total disconnect, which I will avoid doing in my future class room at all costs.

Now, I know I am not alone in my thoughts regarding this professor and the course, as most of my peers are also double majoring in English and education. Although stereotypical, we all LOVE getting together and joking about classic stories like Frankenstein or Don Quixote. In his particular class, most of us lacked that same passion. As one of my friends in this particular course, Iliana Valentín, said in a recent conversation, “Often, we were expected to be fully engaged in discussions we had no interest in, gathering evidence to support ideas that weren’t our own. Whatever you thought about a piece, if it wasn’t what the professor wanted or expected to hear, it wasn’t real.”

My frustrations and thoughts kept bringing me back to that question; what makes people fall “out of love” with school, or more optimistically what makes people fall “in love” with it? I say school because education expands outside the classroom, and learning can happen in any environment. To say people fall in and out of love with learning would be tricky, as people learn something every day simply by living.

As one of my closest friends put it:

“How can I be so passionate about learning, but I don’t love school?”

It’s not just students who fall out of love with school, but educators too. Studies have observed the high turnover rates for teachers, varying from state to state, that leave many school districts in need of quality educators.

Mr. Flaherty, a lifelong educator from my hometown who taught middle school until his retirement last year, is an extremely genuine person. As one of his students back in middle school, I vividly remember understanding his passions for teaching, for history, and for the success of his students. As I expected, Mr. Flaherty responded with a long and thoughtful response to the concept of falling in and out of love with school:

• I fell in love with teaching at Harbor Schools in Newbury, MA, which was an alternative residential school. My classroom had a window looking down into a good sized gym. It also had windows and a door that opened up to a ball field. Very peaceful. Kids were mostly inner city tough high schoolers, but I loved it. I taught there for three years but left to stay home with my infant daughter, Kerry. Kerry is now the art teacher in North Andover.
• After returning to teach from a year of watching my infant daughter, there were no openings at Harbor Schools. I got a job at the Greater Lawrence Educational Collaborative. Same type of kids but they went home every day to crazy lives. It was really hard in the beginning. These were really tough kids who were kicked out of schools in Lowell, Lawrence, Haverhill, and other area towns. I was tested big time by some really tough kids. A lot of them didn’t like me at first and made my day hell. I began to hate the job. I would say it to Judy every morning before leaving and dreaded getting there while driving. But in less than a year, I won them over. It was still very hard but I soon loved it. To this day, I never worked with better people. It was a magic group of people. I am still in touch with many staff and students via FB.
• As I said, it was tough. The most sane six hours of my students lives were the craziest six hours of my day. But I loved it. But gradually, it got to me. Their lives were awful as were their childhoods. Three of my students committed suicide in like one year. I was incredibly close with one of them. His name was Erik. If there is a Heaven, I hope to see him again.
• I needed to get out for my own sanity. I would never talk about my day when home. Judy said she felt like she was married to an inner-city cop. I left in May of 1997. My principal was not happy with me! I still loved teaching, my students, and the school but it was time to go. Luckily, I found a job at the Nock.
• Some things made my love for teaching more difficult. It was never students or even parents. What made things hard at times were administrators and teachers that I didn’t respect. I battled with a few principles… Yet, even when I had bad bosses, I still loved being a teacher.

 

Like Mr. Flaherty, many educators that I spoke with expressed that their frustrations are not a result of student behavior, but rather a result of disconnected administrators. In the 21^stcentury many teachers feel as though the curriculum, subsequently impacting needs of their students, is made by individuals who are out of touch with what is best for the students themselves.

Students like myself also express their disappointment when it comes to school, “The first thing that comes to mind, and I’d imagine that I’m not alone in having this sentiment, is that I never fell in love with school to begin with.”

In the 21^stcentury, when information and facts seem more readily available than ever, many students are starting to ask “Why?” and “How does this benefit me?” while attending class. Young people see the value in learning how to do taxes and how to detect fake news over learning that the mitochondria is the powerhouse of the cell (why does every person who went to middles school seem to remember this arbitrary fact…).

Although there are plenty of reasons to feel discouraged when it comes to schooling, many were able to find a positive side of formal education. The most common response, and perhaps the least surprising, is that a sense love for school stemmed from the people that filled the halls and classrooms. While the final paper you received an “A” on in high school sits at the bottom of a recycling bin, the relationships you created continue to influence the person you are today.

One of the most cherished educators in my hometown, Cathy Hill, expressed that she loved school most while teaching physical education at the G.W Brown Elementary School. This small public school fostered a community where the principal, teachers, parents, and students were like one big family. The Brown was effective in the way it communicated with and cared for all its members, wanting to provide an education where the curriculum engaged students. For example, the Brown taught social-emotional learning through having students raise baby chicks in their classrooms and by allowing free-range giant tortoises to roam the hallways. When students took on the role of caregiver for these community animals, they learned how to be independent while simultaneously understanding the importance of caring for other living beings.

Falling in and out of love with school is extremely subjective, and people often have different visions for the purpose of education. Personally, I believe the purpose of school is to foster an environment that helps students become confident and encourages them to follow their unique passions. Hopefully, students will use those passions, talents and interests to contribute to our greater society. Although I became discouraged this past semester, I guess the “lesson” learned was how to conduct my own teaching practice to better foster an environment that I feel is conductive to education.

 

I am curious if you have ever come across a particular educator, environment, or class that led to you fall in or out of love with being in school – if so, reach out to me!